LilySlim Exercise days tickers

LilySlim Exercise days tickers

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Coming back strong, but some bad news :(

After my 2 day hiatus from yoga. It was time to dive in strong as I am now 1 class behind and it was just bugging the shit out of me. I didn't intend to do a double the 1st night back, but what the hell....I needed piece of mind that I was still on schedule with the challenge =D

Day 28: 6:30pm & 8:15pm w/Valerie

I settled to my usual doubles spot (next to the double door to the left of the teacher's podium) and proceeded with the 1st class. I was very focused until I got to the floor series and it was during the spine strengthening postures where you lay on your stomach that I notice a pain on my left breast. It was very uncomfortable to lay on them so I excused myself to the bathroom during full locust pose to examine myself. I felt a lump and immediately went into a panic. I was scared and all these crazy thoughts came into my head, but there was nothing I could do this time in the evening so I returned to my mat during fix firm pose. I went into autopilot through the remaining postures. My mind was all over the place and I was freaking out, but I managed to calm myself down toward the end of the 1st class. It was getting too cold near the doors so I moved to the second row close to the studio entrance for my 2nd class when the 1st class ended.

I wasn't sure if I was still going to stay for the 2nd class, but I needed to keep myself busy so I decided to stay. I was much more focused this time around, but the lump in my left breast was still hanging on my conscious heavily. I finished class strong and just headed home.

After I showered, I woke my sister up to tell her about the lump and that I'm scared. It was nice to let someone know. I knew nothing can be done at the moment so I just attempted to sleep. I am usually pretty tired after a double, but it took me a while to fall asleep tonight.

Woke up this morning and went to work to wait until my doctor office is open to call. I figured that there is no point to take the day off and have all this free time to think. I told a few of my friends what happened and they were so nice to offer to take the day off to go to the doctor with me so I don't have to be alone. I have such wonderful people surrounding me!!!!!!! Called the doctor office to let them know what happened, but the earliest appointment was on Friday. I'm not happy about the wait, but it is what it is. I'm at least taking the right steps to deal with this and discovered it rather early. I recently had my female exam a month ago with good results so I'm hoping this is nothing serious. I am still extremely scared, but I'm trying to really not get too stressed out =X

I had planned/scheduled on doing a double tonight so I might still stick to it. My mind needs to keep busy and focus on other things right now. Work and yoga is definitely helping with this and my friends support has been very helpful. My sister even did all this research online for all these possible diagnosis that are not breast cancer so I'm feeling a bit better. I figure I should still continue with my routine as is and take things one step at a time with this lump. Easier said than done, but keeping myself busy with yoga is a great start for now. Until then....namaste <3

6 comments:

  1. Awww Sara. Hugs!!! Let's not get too ahead of ourselves though. Until you get a mammogram, nothing is for certain. It could be a variety of benign things....it's not the C word for sure. Sometimes too much salt makes my boobs sensitive. I'm not trying to make light of what you're going through but hopefully helping a bit? One thing at a time, breathe...just like in the studio during and in between the postures. You'll be ok. I just know it. I've gone through this a few times and I have had aunts on both sides of my family suffer from actual breast C. One is no longer with us, the other is fine after treatment. BUT you are far far far from being diagnosed. ONE thing at a time...just breathe. Your body goes through all sorts of changes...esp near every decade of your life.

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    1. Thanks Ching! I'm trying really hard to not get ahead of myself, but it's so nerve racking to not know. I'm hoping that it's the additional salt intake, sudden jump in physical activity, my coming menstrual, or me turning the BIG 30 that is causing this. Whatever it is, I have no choice but to take it one day at a time!

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  2. Sara, I had a similar thing happen a few weeks ago at the beginning of the challenge. I felt pain in the top of one breast when I was lying on my stomach. I got worried but it went away in a day or two. I think this may be a result of doing so much yoga. For now I'd assume that's the case, but always good to get it checked out. We're all here for you!!!! Take care lady and go easy on yourself for the next few days....

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  3. I am sure you will be fine Sara, let's stay strong until Friday and find out that the lump is just temporary! =) Everything will be ok, we are all here for you!

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  4. Thanks gals! I'm trying to stay calm and think positive. Yoga shall keep my negative thought at bay. Hoping for the best, but prepared to face whatever it is. I will keep you all updated on my post and when I run into you lovely ladies.

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  5. Sara, as we get older we collect things.. Fatty tissue etc I'm a rock garden, poked and prodded cyst and fibroids. Many of my friends had found a bump and when it all got checked out it was nothing but a wake up call that we need to do more self checks and eat antioxidants. Don't worry just yet, this is very common. One day you will share the same advice to another young'in. Just like our teacher said "smile" it makes things easier.

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